Scooperific Liz Smith Corners Mailer, Madonna

By S.T. VanAirsdale

Where last week it was Cindy Adams wowing us with her bemused Todd Haynes love-pat, this week Liz Smith is stepping up with a magical display of range. I'm not talking about today's jaw-dislocating Golden Compass blow job ("[A] triumph on the order of The Lord of the Rings. ... The rest of the actors are famous and British and just "too too" for words. ... [I]t's just a fairy tale for Pete's sake! Go! Take your children!"), either, or even her hots for Independent Spirit Award nominees Frank Langella and Pedro Castaneda. Instead, check out Madonna keeping it real, telling Liz at this week's Revolver bash in New York that she would love to work with her husband Guy Ritchie again, except:

"They don't want us to ... They, them, out there, the media. It isn't worth the deaths they inflict."

Yes -- we, us, out here. It's true, the media shit in our own mouths five years ago with Swept Away. We owe ourselves an apology. Then there's Liz setting the record straight about that screen adaptation of The Naked and the Dead attributed to John Mailer shortly after his father Norman's death last month:

"On the very day of his funeral in Provincetown, [Mass.], by some accident of fate, there appeared a press release saying I'd make a movie of his book The Naked and the Dead. I am not blaming anyone for this, but it was premature and inaccurate to say the least.

"It is true I did an adaptation of this novel sometime ago. He liked it very much and signed over rights to me. Someday perhaps it will be a film. But for now I am appalled at the timing of it all. I just want to disavow that and say I would never have connected such a project with my family's loss. And we do so much appreciate the kindness of his many friends and fans!"

"Accident of fate"? Not very Maileresque, I must say. Somebody ask Liz who inherited the old man's determinism.

Posted at December 6, 2007 8:15 AM