Diamonds and Dirt: Page Six Reports on Amputeegate and Gallo's "Friend"

Another column, another coup for Page Six, which today brings African amputee scandals front-and-center with the showstopping support act of Vincent Gallo. By now, you've likely heard about Blood Diamond Amputeegate, wherein non-dangerous hack filmmaker Ed Zwick dragged his film's cast and crew into South Africa and Mozambique to shoot where more literal hacks had swung mean machetes in the years before. The rumor popped that Warner Bros. promised prosthetics for lesser-limbed extras, but -- gasp! -- only for release-date publicity; Zwick immediately decried the "cynical and appalling" charges to Nikki Finke; and exasperated studio execs are scurrying to change 25,000 holiday cards to the warm new salutation, "Season's Greetings from Warner Bros., where no good deed goes unpunished."

And, as of today, where no bloody misdeed goes unpublicized:

While Leonardo DiCaprio, Jennifer Connolly and Djimon Hounsou were shooting the movie ... special-effects man Edward Visage lost his hand while handling an explosive device called a squib.

One source on the set in South Africa told Page Six, "Warner Bros. was too cheap to bring in a special-effects guy from the U.S. They used a local guy, and there was an accident and the guy lost his hand. It's ironic because they also brought in orphans for extras who had lost their limbs from machete-wielding rebel soldiers in the war -- and this guy lost a hand on set."

But another source said, "[Visage] is a professional special-effects technician. He was immediately evacuated to a medical facility. The accident was investigated by local authorities and it was determined that proper procedures were followed. The studio has provided [Visage] with appropriate assistance, a prosthetic hand and compensation and he is now back to work."

I know, I know -- give the guy a hand, wocka wocka. Honestly, though, I don't even know why I'm writing about this when just a few items down, the column features even more trenchant ethno-political commentary from a skeevy-as-ever Vincent Gallo:

Brown Bunny director Vincent Gallo, 45, has a new friend -- Los Angeles "It" Girl Cory Kennedy, 16. Kennedy, who blogs about her nightlife exploits and dalliances with celebrities despite being underage, has called Gallo a "keeper" on her blog and posts pictures of them together. Asked to comment, Gallo -- who stressed there is no sexual relationship between the two -- told Page Six: "With the psychotic, middle-aged Madonna out there on the loose buying up all the stolen Negro babies in Africa, I felt it my social and humanitarian duty to take in any young, beautiful and sexy orphaned Jew teens running wild in Beverly Hills. Cory's a great kid, and I'm proud to be her daddy."

And anyone so presumptuous to worry about Gallo's own planned "charitable donations to youth" this winter can take their cynical, appalling apprehensions elsewhere. I mean, Kennedy is 16, after all. It's not like Ed Zwick playing keep-away with a titanium leg or anything.

Posted at October 25, 2006 12:38 PM